i can make u an offer

i like to think a lot.. thats what i mostly do, if i am not working, sleeping or talking on fone.. now dont ask me if i have any other hobbies.. i don’t. i always promise myself i will follow the news on the weekend or re-do my 3 year old resume.. but i usually end up spending my weekends thinking.. i think.. a lot.. questions like .. y does my apartment always smell of whats cooking upstairs? or why is it that my laptop adapter gets so hot in 10 mins.. y does my apartment smell of whats cooking upstairs can be a question i can answer.. 1. because i normally get a cut of whats cooking upstairs and 2. intense indian or pakistani food smells, guess thats what tingles the taste buds. however being an engineer myself its a disgrace i can’t answer y the adapter gets heated up..(disgrace?? probably not!)
people do many things.. on office time.. i like to browse for deals on deals2buy but as my manager puts it.. “he only looks”
i have been wondering recently.. 2 years in new york.. bit more, i have not seen the statue of liberty up close.. but thats all right.. my landlord upstairs spent all his life working just outside the world trade center, he thought he can go visit the wtc whenever he wanted to.. its there any ways…

its so easy to sit and watch the days pass by.. it was only yesterday when i sat on a flight completely clueless.. nothing much changed.. i am still clueless.. but maybe i am already bored of the color green.. plastic looks much better to me..

its time for a change.. i can make an offer.. probably I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your address..

what do u think?

its time for ‘em to be back

probably its time for the vampires to be back on earth.. and while i tried to get a reason for this thought i realised that these r the only creatures who actually have any sort of control.. control on free will..
God said u cannot control, free will..(in Bruce almighty) and Devil couldn’t.. in Constantine..

but above all i think its time.. human beings had enough in this world.. and anyways warewolves are animals..(probably many feel .. so r vampires) nevertheless
they say think before u wish.., but i would really like to travel to transylvania, might end up being bitten, or if they plan to settle in some other part of the world more easily accessible than transylvania or if they plan to scatter everywhere and take over the whole world.. then i might not have to go anywere to get bitten here at the ease of my home.. lets c what happens and whats in their minds..

..is a sign of prosperity

given my obsession with myself – i am often found standing in front of the mirror staring at myself.. .. GAWD!!!.. just joking.. i don’t do that and those who know me know i don’t do that..
anyways.. thought of doing that this weekend.. and then discovered that i had developed a sort of something like a pot belly.. wao wao wao.. chill… its not a pot belly as in pot belly.. its a cute small bulge.. which in case i don’t take care might eventually turn into a full scale pot belly..
given that i am carrying a potential pot belly.. and that this is going to become an asset in the long term.. as my dady would put it.. “is a sign of prosperity”.. my son your social status will not be measured not by how many apartments you own.. or how many cars you own but by the radius of your belly..
although i guess he is one of the most handsome man in my locality.. but probably i guess he is showing his sign of prosperity and i being his son, decided to start early..

in our part of the world.. having a pot belly is a sign of prosperity.. and talk about slim girls.. are actually under-nourished..
although i promised myself to exercise often(monthly) and eat healthy food(Right Aid had this extreme offer.. 1 Haagen Daaz tub free with another.. and next day 1 chocolate bar free with another.. – at this point of time my fridge is half emptyhalf full, however it wasn’t on Saturday when i went to the market.. and if you don’t trust me try the coffee in Ice Cream.. and as my mommy tells me that ice cream might be bad for me(when others say i should eat more) she painfully pointed out that i have actually developed a tummy which is visible these days and that my fiancée might out…:(

i knew they’d dominate us..

For a change i decided to checkout whats happening in this world.. and i started to read..(gawd..!! i already feel different, given that the only things i read in this world are the weather report everyday and the older posts in my blog).. and gawd.. what did I read?? its in the news,, and its all over.. it reads “Decline and Fall of the Y Chromosome and the Future of Men” which in terms of the common man like me means “Men on road to extinction” or “Men will no longer be required – by women” or “God!! they will not need us” or …. bla bla bla.. guess you have already figured out what’s in my mind..

However the best part of what i liked in this article is and i quote

“Humans can’t become parthenogenetic [asexually reproduce], like some lizards, because several vital genes must come from the male”

What will u gurls do without us.. be like lizards..(oh gawd!!! that’s funny… oh gawd!!!.. gawd!!!)

anyways, after reading this i feel like a used tissue paper which the world no longer needs/ or thinks about.. gosh, i am becoming extinct.. sob sob sob..

2 years and still receding

it doesn’t seem like yesterday.. not like everyone expresses… i can’t remember much of the past year.. this sounds like i am 65 but actually i am a teenager..:( so i will write everything here..

recession hit this country me bad.. (now wait till i start to crib about my salary), it hit others worse.. so i better don’t stress..
this time its right in the middle of wall street and fortunately and/ unfortunately thats where my office is.. right in the middle of all the hallabulla..

Too many changes.. that occured over the past 1 year… US got a new leader(and a lot of articles in timesofindia tell me that its actually good for the “us”-The Outsourcing Enablers).. IPL happened many times this year.. few of my rich Uncles died in nigeria and several other african countries leaving me 2 oil wells and a few million US dollars..(i will be contacting their lawyers/widows soon with my full SSN details , postal address and bank account details).. terrorists created more havoc in India.. terrorists also targetted cricketers..(as if there was not enuf publicity).. dragons use optical zoom to see.. i did not get a promotion.. slumdog sweeped(??) at the oscars.. amitabh said its not worth it.. its lead child actor got sold to a sheikh for money.. coraline 3D released.. pirates actually exist outside the caribbeans.. air force one needs more publicity.. volunteered at NYCares and got to watch free Bugs movie in IMAX with a bunch of teeny weeny cuddly cuddly kids.. learnt that the she praying mantis rips off her man’s head during the reproductive procedures if she feels he is not upto the mark.. ..and swine flu is the latest in-thing in US.

I gathered enough courage to move into my own (rented)apartment(with a backyard where i can play basketball with the kid upstairs),
Now my worldly posessions also includes a big size HDTV apart from the array of formal clothes, 2 pairs of jeans, vaseline lip guard and my cell phone(which is obviously better than THE iPhone).
And have preserved the half filled(writing half empty would mean i am a pessimist)vodka bottle in my fridge from the last occupants to show give impression that i booze drink respectfully when no one is looking.

For a change i cleaned up my desk in office thus stuffing everything in the drawer, and i actually decided to write my “2 year in wall street” post and thus saying a final TaTa to my 360 blog..,

and yes.. i got engaged..